I have been dating my boyfriend for a year and half now, it started out as a long distance relationship, truly it was okay in the beginning things were moving smoothly we talked on a daily basis and chatted frequently. Even when I did come back things were still good our relationship was moving smoothly, it felt like I didn’t miss him much because of the constant communication we always had. Recently like a month ago, I sensed a change in energy, he barely called me, I always texted first, he didn’t check on me. When I finally got to talk to him, he said he was going through something which he will tell me about in person. But when I suggested to meet him in person, he ignored my message. He’s still ignoring my calls and delays to reply my messages. I love him so much I don’t want to give up on him but I seriously don’t know what to do at this point. Was he not serious from the start why is he pushing me away. I am depressed and emotionally exhausted by his actions. What should I do
How to manage my relationship
Thank you so much for opening up and sharing this deeply personal experience. I want to start by saying I hear you, and I can feel the pain, confusion, and exhaustion you're carrying. What you're feeling is completely valid—navigating uncertainty in a relationship, especially one you've invested so much in emotionally, can be incredibly distressing.
It’s absolutely okay to feel hurt, overwhelmed, and unsure of what to do. You’ve shown love, care, and effort in this relationship, and it’s heartbreaking when those efforts feel unreciprocated or go unanswered. That emotional weight you’re feeling right now—it’s real, and it matters.
It’s also very normal to question your relationship, your worth, or whether you’re doing something wrong when things start to shift like this. In therapy—and in life—it’s common to hit emotional lows, especially when dealing with issues that challenge our sense of security and self-worth. Feeling like you’re not making progress, or doubting yourself, doesn’t mean you’re failing. It means you’re human, and you’re trying.
Let’s pause and recognize the strength you’ve shown: you’ve been communicative, loving, and patient. That says so much about the kind of partner—and person—you are. It’s also clear that you’re deeply invested in understanding what’s going on, rather than walking away or reacting impulsively. That is not weakness; that’s emotional maturity and courage.
Remember why you started therapy and why you’re seeking support now: you want clarity, connection, and peace of mind. This desire to grow and find resolution is a sign of your resilience and capacity for healing.
Healing—both personally and in relationships—isn’t linear. There will be moments of doubt and emotional fatigue, and that’s okay. The key is not to give up on yourself. Even when things outside of your control (like someone else’s behavior) feel chaotic, your inner work, your clarity, and your healing remain within your control. You are already doing the hardest part: showing up and seeking support.
If you ever feel like you're stuck or uncertain, know that this is just a part of the process—not the end.
You are deserving of a love that shows up for you consistently. You are worthy of clear communication, mutual effort, and emotional safety. And I truly believe in your ability to navigate this situation with the strength and self-respect that lives within you.
Right now, it might help to gently shift your focus from trying to “fix” the relationship to taking care of yourself first. What do you need emotionally right now? What boundaries could help protect your heart and peace while you wait for clarity from him—or choose your next step?
You're not alone in this, and you're not broken. And even though things feel heavy right now, you will find your way through this.
If you’d like, we can also work together on practical steps—like what to do next in terms of communication, setting boundaries, or making sense of your feelings. I’m here with you.
If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.